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With Apologies To Paul Simon, 50 Ways To Tell You’re Getting An MBA

I got the idea to make this list for the 50 ways you know you’re getting an MBA, while I was on the bus this morning commuting to work.  Then I got to work and had some friends help me put this list together!  If you have any more to add just leave a comment! ENJOY!

You know you’re going for your MBA when… (1-10)

1. …BeatTheGMAT shows up as one of your most recently visited websites.

2. …your friends keep asking you “How is school?” and you have to explain that you’re still applying.

3. …you correct someone who uses improper GMAT idioms in speech and then apologize for doing so.

4. …you begin argumentative banter with someone with the sentence “Well the assumption here is _________”

5. …the acronym CPG means something to you.

6. …you know what the “Trifecta” of B-schools is.

7. …you cannot wait until Spring.

8. …you wonder if first year is really as hectic as current students say it is.

9. …you like to talk about yourself but at this point you’re over it!

10. …the Internet has become so small because you only frequent X amount of sites.

You know you’re going for your MBA when… (11-20)

11. …you know refer to each school by their major donor names, ie Tuck, Stern, Booth, and Ross.

12. …you still have no idea what Social Entrepreneurship is but you know that a lot of people want to do it!

13. …you’ve considered consulting but were turned off by their interview process.14. …you’ve considered Consulting until you found out they can make you retake the GMAT if they want…and can even ask your SAT scores!

15. …your heart palpitates at the thought of the GMAT.16. …you can pinpoint the major characteristics of the top 25 schools…and just by talking to someone for 5 minutes, can say to them “Ok so you should look into [Insert School] because they have X,Y, and Z.”

17. …you’ve already planned out what activities your life will consist of when the application process is done (or the fact that you will actually HAVE a life again).

18. …you didn’t realize how much it was going to cost you just to CONSIDER applying to business school

19. …you hate defending yourself to those who say you don’t need and MBA and think to yourself “um you’re already SVP!” and at the same time the company is hiring MBA’s!

20. …you tell everyone how important getting an MBA is and you can’t understand why they’re not going for theirs.

You know you’re going for your MBA when… (21-30)

21. …you read my blog 😉

22. …the thought of paying $200k to just be able to add three letters [MBA] to your resume doesn’t faze you.  (Yes FAZE is the correct word here as per MS Word grammar check)

23. …when talking to others going through the process you start with “My friend at [Insert Top 10 B-school Here] said…]

24. …October/December or December/March or any other pair of Application/Decision months is the most nerve-wracking months of the year.

25. …you’ve had ENOUGH of being introspective!

26. …when the most strenuous part of your day is listening to others ask you about how the process is going.

27. …you realize the people who want to go into Non-Profit were people who were Investment Bankers and people who were in Non-Profit want to get into Investment Banking.

28. …you are beginning to work on your alcohol tolerance because from what current students tell you, you’ll need it to be as high or higher than in during undergrad.

29. …you start to get more excited about all the drinking that you’ll be doing in business school than the network you’ll build.

30. …when someone tells you that they reached out to a student at [Insert School] you ask who it was to figure out if you know them.

You know you’re going for your MBA when… (31-40)

31. …you know where your target schools rank in US News, Business Week, and the Wall St Journal.

32. …your significant other is more ready for the GMAT to be over than you are.

33. …you’re at dinner and you always insist on calculating the tip without a calculator and get upset when someone talks while you’re doing it!

34. …you have to dig deep to find the strength to continue working with passion.

35. …you get annoyed when people ask questions found on the school’s website at MBA fairs.

36. …you are the go to person that anyone that has a question about B-school comes to you.

37. …things like Clear Admit, Veritas, MGMAT, and Stacy Blackman have direct meaning to you.

38. …you hear people discussing an essay and you instantly know which school it’s for.

40. …you have your phone off on a Friday or Saturday night and your significant other calls and you say that you were studying for the GMAT and the excuse doesn’t get questioned.

You know you’re going for your MBA when… (41- 50)

41. …you know that the questions “Why MBA?” and “Why MBA now?” warrant completely different essays.

42. …you are no longer up on the latest episodes of your favorite TV shows.

43. …your email inbox is full of MBA program information that you didn’t request.

44. …a 5 hour road trip to visit a school seems like nothing.

45. …you know that if you have three jobs in three years (Current job, internship, post-mba job) that’s a good thing.

46. …your LinkedIn connections have double since you began this process.

47. …instead of asking your friends “How was your weekend?” you ask “How did studying go?”

48. …you feel guilty when you go out with your friends for dinner and/or drinks, because you know you should be working on your applications.

49. …you speak about Admissions Officers as if they’re your BFF’s.

50. …you cannot wait to graduate in 2013!!!

Thanks to B, J, and E for helping me get this put together!

This report is adapted from Richard Battle-Baxter’s blog posts at “Ellipsing My Way…To Business School.”

Previous posts by Richard at Poets&Quants:

Should You Hire an MBA Consultant?

Study for the GMAT or Polish Off an Essay?

Am I Really Cut Out For This?

My First Round Applications Are Looking Elusive

A Frustrating Day and Night on GMAT Prep

Having Trouble Hitting the Submit Button

It’s Nearly Midnight. Where Are All My Friends?

“Why An Admissions Consultant Objected To My Essay on Coming Out”

“Brain Racing at 4 a.m. Thinking About Business School”

“After Scoring a 620 on My GMAT, I Want To Die”

“Walk Me Through Your Resume” – My Interview at Dartmouth’s Tuck”

“My GMAT Students Are ‘Totally Obsessed Weirdoes With Unbelievable Work Ethics”