Speaking of Stern: The MBA Experience…From a Partner’s Perspective

BEING A PART OF THE STERN COMMUNITY AS A PARTNER

Stern has a number of ways to include partners and integrate them into the Stern community. There is a Stern Partners Club, which is housed under our Student Government. The staple Stern Social events on Thursday evenings (now temporarily on hiatus) always invite partners to join, and many of the student organizations host events that are open to partners. For example, the Association of Hispanic and Black Business Students hosts an annual ‘90s party that tops the list of major social events each year for students and their partners. There are also tons of informal meet-ups and, now, Zoom hang-outs. Mike is more introverted, so I was curious how he felt about being a partner of an MBA student, if he felt included in the community or if he felt that partners should make a point to integrate themselves into the MBA experience more intentionally.

 “Overall, I definitely felt welcomed at events that I did go to, and it was nice to be supportive of you and be a part of that experience. Getting integrated is something that happens over time. Each time I came out, everyone was so nice and willing to include me and other partners. The more events you attend, you see the same people, meet new people, and you become more familiar. And everyone being so friendly and willing to welcome you into the community each time helps make it easier and you feel more a part of that community.”

IMPACT OF THE MBA EXPERIENCE ON THE RELATIONSHIP

The MBA is a self-interested decision. Pursuing your MBA is an exercise in prioritization and time management. One of the difficult realizations that most people have is that your personal relationships might not be the priority when you start school. And that is OK. These are the people who supported us before the MBA and will continue to support us well after we finish the program.

“Any time you help each other achieve a major goal, the other person is there as a source of support and it helps you grow closer together. I don’t think it’s the type of thing where today sitting here we feel like we’re so much closer thanks to Stern, but I think in the long run that’s the type of thing that relationships are built on.

In terms of our long-term plans, I will say I think about them differently. Now that you’ve been taking classes virtually, I see you in class doing your work. I’ve remarked to you that there are classes where I say, ‘That’s really interesting,’ or ‘I could do that, why am I not doing that!’. So I’ve definitely thought more about going back to school myself. Whether or not more school is in my own future, I hope that you completing your degree is something that will change our lives for the better.”

ADVICE FOR FUTURE MBA STUDENTS AND THEIR PARTNERS

You’re making a big commitment to focus on your career development and progress yourself with an advanced degree. This has direct impacts on the time you have for your personal life and relationships. Through our discussion, we have found that, in spite of the challenges, there have been way more positives. We’ve learned things along the way that will make us a better couple and help us build a better future together.

“The most important thing is to try to have a good understanding of what the time and energy commitment is going to be like going into it. That’s the best way to avoid the pitfalls of everything that is involved with business school. That way you can at least have a mutual understanding that you can come back to while going through the process. You can kind of center yourself on that, and remember what the end goal of the commitment is in those times and moments when you wish the other person was free, you haven’t seen them, you wanted to be doing something together, and that goes on both sides.”

CALL TO ACTION

Here are a couple of points to consider in respect to going to business school with your partner:

1) Think about one of the tactics that we shared (sharing calendars with one another, scheduling a date night out or for watching a show together, etc.).

2) If you’re not yet in business school, start thinking about what your communication plan will be and set expectations on the commitment that the program will require from you.

3) If you’re currently in business school, maybe consider interviewing your partner about their experience throughout your time in an MBA program.

Cortne Edmonds, a native of New York and New Jersey, is a second year MBA at NYU Stern School of Business. Prior to business school she worked as a general manager in the language services industry, with experience working in New York, Japan, South Korea, and Israel. After school she will be working in management consulting. Each month, she offers her advice and perspective for prospective and current students looking to maximize their MBA experience.