So I’m sitting in my Friday product strategy meeting, and I’m wiping my sore and swollen nose for the 100th time this morning.. It’s flu season, so all the folks with school age kids have brought their kids’ nasty cooties to work and kindly shared them with the rest of us. Bums.
Since I work in an office building, there is an endless procession of hands touching elevator buttons, door knobs, and the handles of the shared refrigerators in the kitchens on each floor. And I won’t just blame it on the parents. I might very well be the bubonic culprit my damn self. I distinctly remember telling my tutoring student at the midnight mission in Inglewood to use his arm to cover his face (as he sneezed violently in mine) two weeks ago; then last Monday I went to the mission’s Christmas celebration–full of kids–total recipe for illness.
Either way, my job is the perfect petri dish for the fast spread of sickness. And I’ve recently been hit by the ninja. Fun times.
I’m Over it
I tend to be the type who remains emotionally even keel and aloof, and I’ve recently found my way back to my natural state; so I’m kinda over worrying about b-school. I reached that limit some time last week, though, my nerves are still shot–post traumatic stress no doubt.
In the meantime, I have been coasting through each day filling my time with work stuff, NFL games, NBA games, a date or two, reading The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell (hence my obsession with fast spreading epidemics. I apologize in arrears for all the references lol), and sipping hot tea each morning and warm red wine every night. I’m good. Gucci. Chillin. I even wore a kangol to work today (you should have seen the look on my employees’ faces when I walked in looking like your friendly neighborhood pimp–I’ve already heard at least one reference to Andre 3000).
Yeah, so back to this meeting. My week has been productive and I’m ahead on most assignments so I’m not at all worried about being put on the spot. I’m actually more concerned about whether I want Indian Korma or Thai Yellow Curry with Lamb for lunch. As my boss opens up the meeting, I already know based on the subject matter that very little of my input will be needed today. I won’t be back on the accountability hot seat until Monday. So naturally, everything that I’m hearing begins to sounds like Charlie Brown’s school teacher: “wonk wonk wonk…wonk wonk….new features and UI…wonk wonk….bug burn down….wonk…beta release…wonk wonk”.
Then some blooming idiot’s phone beeps loudly in middle of the meeting. What’s that? Oh, its MY phone. Apparently I forgot to put it on vibrate when I came into the office this morning. See this is the kind of schyt that happens when grown people are incapacitated with flu and cold season cooties.
Millennial Values (I’m on the cusp; that’s passing)
As I grab for my phone, I revel in the fact that the next 10 seconds to 2 minutes I’m about to spend all up in my keypad is totally acceptable these days (did I just date myself?). In 2012, everyone is constantly on some mobile device–iPad/iPhone/Samsung, etc–especially at internet/software companies. This crosses my mind only because I can distinctly remember having been reprimanded 4 years ago for reading a text about MY 90+ YEAR OLD GRANDMOTHER BEING IN THE HOSPITAL while sitting in a dumb sales training at the stuffy Fortune 50 I used to work for–friggin nazis man.